You, Jerry, Are the Doofus.

Everyone has fashion hurdles to clear in their everyday life. Today, I glanced at my hurdles for a moment, then shrugged and took the 1 train instead. I completely ignored the button-down policy at my place of work and tucked a long-sleeved Pablo Picasso navy-and-cream-striped shirt into my high-waisted* navy ACNE shorts (whose legs I folded up subtly at the bottom to flatter my gams).

The Picasso shirt is from J. Peterman, that clothier whose verbose catalogues were lovingly skewered on "Seinfeld," where Elaine was a director at the company and introduced us to her Urban Sombrero. It's nice to wear items whose origins you can self-effacingly use as conversation starters. I have cute little anecdotes for most of my favorite pieces. For these shorts, for instance, all I have to do is mention the name of the designer. ACNE! Sick! (It is in fact an equally stupid acronym: Ambition to Create Novel Expressions. Bitch, please.)

I almost made a terrible mistake today. However, I fixed it up quick before I left the house. Here's the accidental fashion trauma waiting to happen:

And here I am after I performed some quick sartorial rhinoplasty:

Can you identify the surgical procedure I performed?  More importantly, do you know why I felt it absolutely necessary?

Hand in your answers at the end of class.

You know you love me (I hate Gossip Girl but it felt dramatically appropriate),

Max

*Now that you bring it up, I'm not altogether sure if the shorts are actually high-waisted or if I in fact just hoist them up so high that they appear so. In any case, my father thinks the look is really unattractive and the name of the blog still applies.

Excellence in Sportswear

Welcome, readers, and thank you for wondering what Juan and I wore today.

This morning I began with an above-the-knee khaki short by Rag & Bone.  I felt the need to save my cutest shirts for engagements later this week, and opted for a sensible summer work tunic: the periwinkle pinstripe linen J. Crew button-down (size XXL) that I stole from my father on the last Jenkins family vacation.

The sheer size and fluidity of the tunic nicely balanced the structured, almost square quality of the shorts.  By the way, it is possible that they are chinos.  I don't know.  Chino sounds so pedestrian.  I suppose I can't help but think of Ryan Atwood's positively Dantesque hometown on The O.C.

Short, white Nike athletic socks (my weakness) and white-with-blue-speckle-effect Vans from the Supreme x Vans collaboration, purchased at the Supreme store on Lafayette Street.

With the summer heat intensifying, there's no telling what fashion accidents may befall Juan and I.  Be sure to follow us on Twitter so as not to miss a minute of our sartorial evolution.

XOXO,

Max